Even though I had little of my own plans this month, I have tried to keep myself busy with my family’s plans. That hasn’t been working out so well. I’m finding it very hard to do nothing. Even though this time in my life has a purpose, waiting on God, I feel I don’t have a purpose. I’m a planner and I don’t like it when I don’t have a plan. Three years ago I planned to learn and grow at the Honor Academy, before graduation I made plans to move to South Africa. The four months in between the two I planned to work at two jobs and raising money to go. However, God didn’t allow me to make plans before I moved back home of what I’ll do next. So now I don’t have a plan. The plan; wait on God. Much easier said than done!
Maybe the real truth is I miss home. Even though I missed my family very much, I knew coming back wouldn’t be easy. I grew very comfortable in South Africa. It was my home. I loved my new family and friends there. Please keep praying for me and pray for my family too. I don’t really know what to tell people when they ask if it’s good to be home now. I don’t feel I am home now. I wish people would understand but most don’t. I am grateful for the ones that do. I do have to remind myself that friends don’t always have all the answers. That makes me grateful for the One that does. God truly understands and has all the answers.
Rejoice in the Lord always. I will say it again: Rejoice! Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near. Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.
Saturday, December 11, 2010
I feel like I just can’t keep myself away from mission trips. 6 weeks after coming back from Africa and I’m on another mission trip but this time closer to home. In fact I feel like the Navajo Reservation is my home. I’ve had the wonderful opportunity of joining my dad, brother, and Flagstaff Mission to the Navajos in bringing a truck and trailer full of presents and giving them out to over a hundred children and parents. I also had the opportunity to teach the kids about the first Christmas and God’s gift to us, leading many to ask Him into their heart for the first time!
I don’t think anything can give me more joy that this. I enjoyed the physical labor of unloading and loading back up many boxes of presents. I enjoyed walking out of my comfort zone with prayer, sharing my testimony, and teaching which now seems normal. I enjoyed making new friends and seeing people the way Jesus sees them. I enjoyed exploring and learning more about my culture with an open mind like I had in South Africa. Most of all, I enjoyed telling kids about my Savior who also saved them and loves them. I’ve felt God’s power and spirit as kids quickly responded and prayed for salvation.
I won’t forget little Devoncly who sat behind everyone else but his big curious eyes that were glued to me couldn’t go unnoticed. Every time I asked if they understood he shook his head, so I explained further. When it looked like the light bulb finally lit up, I asked who wanted Jesus in their hearts and he was the first to raise his hand as if I was handing out candy. Thirteen kids made that decision just then. I talked to each one personally at the end and Devoncly said he was 7 years old and he had Jesus in his heart now.
“If we are seeking Him through prayer and Bible study, we will not likely miss His appointments.” – Beth Moore.
Last I said I felt God was giving me the “go ahead” to do what’s in my heart for my future but with that I feel comes responsibility to do it right. What if I “miss His appointments”? From the quote above I believe God is assuring me that I won’t, not as long as I continue to pray and study His Word. And as long as I have Him by my side, our dreams will unfold in the right time.
“When we wait on God He gives supernatural strength and accomplishes the inconceivable!” - Beth Moore.
Today I felt God’s presence surround me, no, really surround me! His arms held me tight. I find that not many people understand this feeling or really know or have experienced what I’m talking about. Those of you who have felt this know it was like being lifted into the clouds, or heaven touching earth right where I sat. I know my God is real, His love is real, and He means every word when He says, “I know the thoughts that I have of you, … thoughts of peace and not of trouble, to give you a future and a hope.” I will call Him and ask Him, and He will listen to me. I sought Him and found Him, because I searched with all my heart. Paraphrase from Jeremiah 29:11-13. I didn’t miss our “appointment” today!
I found the perfect song for today while going though some of my music, “King of the World” by Point of Grace. Listen to it! This song is where I get my title for this blog.
...I know God had brought be back here in His right time. I ask what His will is but I feel like the question comes back to me. What is my will? What do I want to do with my life? Joshua 1:3 says, “Every place that the sole of your foot will tread upon I have given you,…” and verse 5 goes on, “… I will not leave you or forsake you.” I feel like God is telling me to go, and He will follow me. I guess it has been easier to ask what He wants and do it. It’s easy for me to take orders, I’m a follower. Now God is giving me this life back and I’m responsible for what comes out of it. Will I live to the fullest? Will I take every opportunity? Will I love? Most important, when I’m done and God calls me home, will He say, “Well done, my good and faithful servant”?
All these questions fill my head and God says in verse 9, “Have I not commanded you? Be strong and of good courage; do not be afraid, nor be dismayed, for the Lord you God is with you wherever you go.” It’s not like He is telling me to go off on my own, no, He’s coming with me! With Him by my side I can be more confident I will live a life that worships Him.